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Well, today was the first day of my life as a choir singer. Hallelujah! and Good Lord!
In my earlier post, I shared how my fear of singing in public kept me from auditioning for the choir for ten years. But I finally did it, and now I’m in the choir. Dream come true, camera fade to golden hued scene of me singing with the choir with the voice of an angel.
Maybe not. Instead, today, I found myself scrambling around to locate my music, dashing to church, sternly warning my kids to stay put during the choir’s (first!) rehearsal and wondering where the heck the altos were supposed to stand. We ran through one piece ONCE and a second piece TWICE before abandoning today’s music to rehearse music that wasn’t scheduled for weeks. During mass, I struggled to match melody to lyrics to accompaniment (and other vocal parts), my head buried in my binder and my hair covering my face. I remembered the words that had awed and inspired me during my chat with our music director (‘The majority of the choir members are professional musicians or music majors or former music majors!’) – those words simply made me feel inadequate during rehearsal and mass. I felt like I was the only one lost, trying to figure out the harmonies and hiding behind my hair. Oh boy.
And yet. Even in my fumbling, I experienced wonderful moments. Moments when I was singing the words AND the notes as written, when my voice merged with the voices around me, and I could hear ALL the music. Moments in which I could celebrate the glory of music and prayer rolled into one gorgeous ball and shared with the whole church. THOSE moments showed me how much more lies in store if I work at it.
So, my Sunday lesson for you: When you’re trying that new thing, the new thing that you’ve wanted to do forever:
- Be assured that you will fail, you will make mistakes, you may despair.
- You may look ridiculous in your initial efforts, SO
- Look for those sublime moments (they might be fleeting, pay close attention!), AND
- Bask in them.
- Remember those moments of glory and keep them in your little brain. They’ll help you keep the faith during the long, hard road of WORK you need to do.
Anyone else an enthusiastic beginner – at anything? Share!